Posted Tuesday/February 25, 2003; 10:13 p.m. PST

In common Hockey parlance, the “Slapper from the Blue Line” is a big, hard, lumbering shot sent on net by a big, hard, lumbering player. It may scorch the back of the net with amazing precision, or it may bury into an oncoming defender. It may bounce off of several players (including his own), or it may just go flying blindly over the net to make nothing but a lot of noise when it hits the boards. It’s sent with nary a care in the world. With that said, get ready.

Hey GP, if you’re so “hard” and all, why didn’t you come let your ”peeps” of the last 12 years say goodbye to you in person? Kudos to Desmond “the Cowboy” Mason for showing and blasting the Sonics publicly, instead of letting George Karl do it for you…. Note to Rick Sund, I like the trade, but who was the deal breaker, Kevin Ollie? I knew it; pay up.

A certain Sports Bar owner was heard to say the “Teflon Dawg” a.k.a. Rick Neuheisel, would be gone by the end of the month. However he didn’t count on the Second Coming of Lombardi (Dennis Erickson) to just dazzle the Niner Regime into thinking he was the man for the job. This scribe is wondering if they still sell the same kind of Hot Dogs he let Mirer and Tez munch on….Husky Fans, realize that it’s ok to lie and be the head coach of the Washington Huskies, just ask Don James.

Speaking of Liars and Thieves, the Mariner Propaganda machine continues to roll right along…

Thanks to Freddie Garcia we have no hope in hell of making any kind of deal at the deadline. So what if we have rolled three point some odd million people through the gates of the International House of Baseball every year for the last 3 years? So what if they went through the Seattle Radio Market in search of a suitor like the Mongol hordes through Europe? The $950,000 they lost to Freddie is going to come out of somewhere. Hey, I got an idea? You HAVE to use at least $950,000 worth of garlic on those horrendous fries don’t you?

And with umbrage to the great Late Show host, Nat X., here’s the top five questions heard asked to various sports figures in the Seattle area. Why five? Because the man won’t let us have ten.

#5. “Hey Nate Robinson…. Ever pitch?”

#4. “GP are you with me? Oh, guess not….”

#3. “Reggie Williams? Hi, this is the NFL, please come play with us!”

#2. “Edgar, who’s the new batboy? Oh, THAT’S Bob Melvin…”

and the number one question heard asked to various sports figures in the Seattle area is….

#1. “HOW much are we selling beer for this year? Are you kidding me?”

Next: "Hey everybody else is up there." - March 29, 2003